MikePadgett.com

Buying soap in Brussels on a Sunday is difficult.

I hadn’t even brought my wallet but J had Visa. In default of one and finding none of the other open on a Sunday, the omens were black. You need to have cash or else a store big enough to accept Visa.

This all started because - who’d have thought it - we’d run the soap down to the size of a paracetamol without thinking to replace it at the Delhaize.

That morning, I’d had to shower with shampoo, only half amused. Then in the afternoon, still apparently ignorant of the urgency of the situation, we found ourselves down in Forest-Vorst looking up Chez Moeder Lambic, one of Brussels’ great bars.

Right then, whilst licking our lips at the prospect of a juicy brew, we realised we were out of cash. It was a torrid early summer afternoon - perfect for sitting down for a jar, not trudging the streets of an unfamiliar neighbourhood looking for a cashpoint.

Well, now we may as well buy soap, I thought. The particular brand that J likes ought to be quite common, though I’m no expert on soap, I’ll confess. I could wash my face with a bar of Vanish and not notice (I once did). But I digress.

Needless to say, after 20 minutes or so on the cobbles, no cashpoint could be found. Unlike the English, Belgians are not married to their money.

We headed back to the car all dry. Through Charleroi, the bottom of Avenue Louise, Waterloo, Regent, Montoyer, Luxembourg, Trèves, Belliard … not a single cashpoint in front of or near which we could stop the car. Banks aplenty: Dexia, KBC, ING. No cashpoints attached to any of them. The sun was beginning to set and any shops that had been open were surely closed now anyway.

Belgian shops are there for their own convenience, not that of their customers. This is a refreshingly unconsumerist take on consumerism.

So now, almost home, we made the safest bet: the Fortis at Schuman. A cashpoint with the “wood effect” user interface. And a single, comfortably-sized parking spot was free just in front of it.

We parked and J rummaged in her bag.

She had forgotten to bring her wallet in the first place.